Still haven't found...

It can be pretty demoralizing, this whole job hunt process. It's like people always say about the entertainment industry, 'you have to be willing to accept rejection...over, and over and over.' Like so many time honored adages, that's far easier said than done. I would say that I have applied to around 1,000 jobs in the 3 months or so that I've been out of work. I have had a total of 4 interviews, and none of them have resulted in full time jobs. Now, some of these interviews have resulted in part time work, some of them have led to other interviews, and none of them have been totally pointless.

I did, however, go on an interview recently that had the potential to be pointless. My old boss set me up with the wife of a friend of his who runs a film distribution company. I have been working in the film production world, so this interview wasn't exactly for my dream job. But, distribution is a big part of the film industry, and I figured it couldn't hurt to practice interviewing(and who am I kidding, I'll take far less than my dream job at this point) . I emailed this lady asking for an informational interview, and we worked out the particulars. I did some light research on her company and entered the interview feeling like I had nothing to lose. When I arrived at the office, I was ushered into a large palatial corner office with a nice view of lower Manhattan. She came into her office, looked me up and down and asked if I brought a copy of my resume. I tried to make some small talk about the weather, thanked her for taking time out of her busy schedule, at which point she felt compelled to tell me, "We don't have any openings right now, just so you know." I was a little stunned, but I pressed on. I think part of me wanted to win her over. I brought a list of questions, and the first 4 that I asked elicited only two or three word answers. Then I asked her to tell me about how she got to be where she is today. She began to open up a bit and we started to just have more of a conversation than an interview. I made a point about the changing landscape in how people are watching films/tv, and it really seemed to get through to her. She made a face that seemed to say, 'this guy might not be a moron.' She got up from the table we were sitting at, and went over to her desk. Picking up an org chart, she said, "I just remembered we are trying to fill an entry level position."

I was elated. It wasn't even like I wanted this job so badly, I just felt a sense of accomplishment for turning her around. Leaving that interview, i felt reinvigorated. It was sort of besides the point that I never heard back from her about that entry level job that I didn't want in the first place (no, I'm not bitter, you're bitter). But, I tell this story because it highlights the change in my mindset about this unemployment thing: It's a process that is going to take some time. A good friend of mine was out of work for 6 months last year, and I remember thinking how outrageously long that seemed. 'What is wrong with him?' I used to think as I sat at my seemingly stable job. Now, I realize how difficult it is to find a job in this economy. My old boss just got a new project, but since they have been able to survive with a skeleton crew for the last few months, they see no reason to bring me back on. That seemingly pointless interview that he helped me get is now spurring me on. If you get out there, talk to anyone who will give you five minutes, and keep pushing, who knows what will happen. If you make enough good impressions, something's gotta give. I know, there's one of those adages again: much easier said than done.

I Don't Deserve a Lockout, The Ultimatum of a broke Bills Fan

I was one of the millions of fans who watched a few dozen NFL players hold up a #1 to express solidarity for the upcoming work stoppage in the NFL on Thursday night. It's Friday night before the first Sunday of the 2010 NFL season, and I am preparing for a season that, baring a miracle, will be the 11th in a row that has ended with my favorite team (The Buffalo Bills) missing the playoffs. In that elven years, I have attended countless games, bought far too many jerseys of players who are no longer with my team, and spent an alarmingly high percentage of my time watching the NFL, looking at mock NFL drafts on- line, and playing Madden. I was in college for some of those years, and a letter I recently received from the Social Security agency said I made $867 in 2003. That same year that I went to two games, bought a Takeo Spikes Jersey, and Bills themed birthday gifts for 2 family members. All of that money went to the NFL. If the players union and owners can't find a way to fairly split up 65% of my gross earnings in 2003, then they don't deserve my loyalty. I will shamefully admit that I have spent more time in recent years following football than doing many productive activities. These neglected activities include: reading books, exercising, forming a relationship with my parents or siblings, and advancing my career. I love The Buffalo Bills, I love NFL football. But, if the NFL misses more than 1 game because of a labor dispute, I will never again watch an NFL game or give a red penny to the NFL. I have been a blindly loyal fan for my whole life. I have emotionally and financially supported a franchise who consistently puts a sub-par product on the field, and I don't deserve a lockout.

There are certainly things that need to change in the NFL, but there is no reason they should have to deprive us of football. Aren't there a few things we can all agree on:

#1. The rookies make far too much money. There is no reason why Sam Bradford (a QB who hasn't completed a pass in the NFL and $50 million of his $78 million contract is guaranteed) should make more guaranteed money than someone who is a proven stud like say, Jahari Evans (who has $19 million guaranteed in his 6 year $57.6 million contract).

#2. The players and the league both need to take care of the players who have sacrificed their bodies for the building of their sport. Tom Brady makes more in a week than 99.9% of the best players before 1975 made in their entire career(Johnny Unitas Hall of Fame quarterback, 3-time MVP, Superbowl champion, 10-time Pro Bowl selection
Estimated lifetime earnings: $4 million) . The fact that an organization making as much money as the NFL doesn't have enough money to put all former players on top-tier health insurance says something about the viciousness of the sport. The fact that you can get cut tomorrow and the team doesn't owe you another dime forces players back in the game with concussions and unhealed injuries. This cut throat culture has lead to countless stories of hobbled former players trying to get some financial help from a league they built and no longer acknowledges them.

So, Owners, players union, fix this and keep playing. Keep making gobs of money in this depressed economy. The Saints - Vikings game got the biggest rating of any non Super Bowl game ever. Why would you ever want to mess with such a good thing? Sure, some of the fans will come back after a work stoppage. Heck, probably most of them will. I, however, am one of your best fans, and you will lose me forever.

(I know this post doesn't exactly fit with the unemployment theme of this blog, but watching Millionaires and Billionaires get ready to willfully leave their jobs makes me especially crazed as I cash my $378 a week)

THE ORANGE ONE

I know it can be hard to fill the days. I could never relate to that sentiment when I was working. Retirement always seemed like something at which I will excel. I have always been confident that my days could easily be filled with activities of my own choosing that stimulated my mind, body, and soul. There is, however, an element to retirement that is missing in unemployment: financial security. So, being flat-ass broke, your options are decidedly limited. I live in the NYC area, so getting out for say a round of golf would require a car, a friend, and about $150. It's amazing how even the simplest activities can be sneaky expensive. Even going to a museum, you have to pay for the train, the ticket, the over priced scone, and the weed to make it interesting to walk around a museum by yourself on a Tuesday afternoon.

One form of entertainment that is as reliable as free entertainment can be are podcasts. I have been religiously listening to the Tony Kornheiser Show, in podcast form, since he went back on the air about a year ago (I also listened at my desk, and in a totally unrelated story: I'm now unemployed). Tony talks a lot about the DC are where he lives. It is, in effect, a local show. But, I find him so amusing, so curmudgeonly, and so entertaining, that I can't miss even a day. He has a segment called, "Old Guy Radio" where he can guess any song his producer plays from the 60s in about 2 seconds, and his love/appreciation for music is apparent. Tony is widely known as a sportswriter, but the show covers everything from his lust for mint chip ice cream to his abhorrence for DC area cyclists clogging up the road ways. He can get a little out of hand when he goes off on a rant, but his guests are excellent, and hey, it's free. Here are a list of some of the other free podcasts I listen to on a very regularly basis while trolling on the job search websites. These podcasts cover topics like sex advice, music, sports, and comedy. They range from the slightly above average to the sublime:

- The Adam Carolla Show (daily)
- Fitzdog Radio (2x per week)
- AfroMarc Podcast (whenever he damn well feels like it)
- Radio Lab (twice a month, don't miss it)
- This American Life (weekly)
- Daves of Thunder (2x per week)
- Savage Love (weekly)
- The B.S. Report (usually a few times a week)

You can find all of these podcasts on Itunes. If you are reading a blog, I trust you can figure out how to download a podcast. Happy listening.

wedding season

So, I've been getting a lot of "wow, you got laid off in the summer, what great timing!" I suppose that's partially true. More free time means more time to sit in the sun, which has given me one of the best tans I've had in years. I figure looking good can only help in interviews, but you probably don't want to make your interviewer jealous of how golden brown you are. But I digress. There is a drawback to not having a job and/or paycheck during these most most sunniest of months: It's Wedding Season, baby!

It can be difficult to maintain a conversation with people you haven't seen in years when your self confidence is in the toilet. I find myself saying, "Oh me? I'm great, but enough about me, what have you been up to?" I really shouldn't feel that bad about myself. My company was forced to go on an indefinite hiatus, it's not like I got fired. I shouldn't feel worthless, per se. But, when the guys you went to college with are comparing their sports cars and asking you what you've been up to, it still stings to say, "I'm unemployed." Explaining that it's not really your fault can often sound like an excuse, and explaining it more than once is damn near impossible for me. I find that this feeling of minor self loathing can lead to constant drinking, which is never a good look in front of the bride's grandparents. Old pals usually don't ask tough, probing questions when you are screaming the lyrics to "You Shook Me All night Long" in their face. That usually just reminds your old pals about the old days in college when none of us had jobs. So, my advice would be to stay on the dance floor and develop a good report with the DJ.

These weddings, however, are an idea that's spreading like wildfire. I'm 27, so I'm right in the sweet spot of the marriage tornado. It's getting to the point where more of my friends are married than single. My girlfriend and I have been together for more than 5 years, so we are constantly harassed about when we'll be tying the knot. Luckily, she's in no rush, and no one expects the unemployed guy to spring for a ring. I have 6 weddings this summer, and none of them are within 500 miles of where I live. Travel, hotel, bachelor party, and gifts all conspire to make me even lighter in the pocket book. I would love to buy all my friends the best wedding present they could imagine, but now they're lucky if I get them anything under the widely accepted 1 year time frame. Most of the stress I feel before these weddings melts away once the festivities are under way. I am usually just glad to be there for one of the most important events of my friends' lives. I find myself surrounded by people who I wish I got to see a lot more frequently, and an army of kind men and women who hand-deliver appetizers to my face. Like I said before, one way to avoid the constant probing questions about your job/financial situation is to avail yourself of the open bar. Because hey, the booze is free. Happy wedding season, it's almost over.

Getting Shredded

When I had that inconvenient time suck called a 'full time job', I could never find the time to go to the gym. Now that I have eliminated that clutter from my life, I really have no excuse not to be doing some sort of physical exercise on a daily basis. I suppose this newfound free time could also be filled with extended gorging sessions, but luckily I've managed to avoid that so far (as I'm on a tight budget and can't afford to buy enough food to gorge myself). Being unemployed, I can't really afford a trainer or gym membership. Luckily, my apartment building has a gym with just enough equipment to keep me satisfied. I wouldn't say that I've reached the status of being completely shredded, but you'll be glad to know I've been making some progress.

Yesterday morning, I had a good hard work out, and I was feeling pretty good about myself. The blood was pumping and I decided that I would take a walk around the block to get a gatorade and cool down. It was a gorgeous day out, and the park next to my apartment was filled with young mothers pushing their toddlers on swings while playing brick breaker on their blackberries. I live right in the center of Hoboken, and I used to work in Manhattan. As I walked across the street towards the park, I was reminded that I definitely live in New Jersey. A white, two-door, tricked out honda civic blew past me bumping some hideous electronic brand of rap. I ventured out into the street, in the center of the cross walk, behind this abortion of a car. I could see from the back that this was no ordinary Honda Civic. The owner of the car, in an effort to show the world that he was in the upper echelon of elite douche bags, decided to place Ferrari stickers all over the back of his Honda.

When I was directly behind the car, this guy decided to throw his high performance (decal'd) vehicle in reverse because he saw a friend of his walking down the street. Why would you look to see if someone was walking behind you before pulling a move like that? You wouldn't. He slammed into my leg, and I pounded on the car for him to watch out. He actually hit me with his car, and when I said, "watch out," he wasn't exactly compelled to apologize. He tried to ignore me at first and continued to greet his hombre. When I told him that he just hit me with his car, he said, "then don't walk in front of my car, a$$hole." His spiky hair and enormous sunglasses must have been pinching his tiny brain, because I didn't walk "in front" of his car. I walked behind it, in the cross walk. Having recently gotten my swell on in the gym, the thought crossed my mind to start some sort of fracas. But this guy looked like he might be packing, and the fact that his friend was there made the thought of getting pounded in front of all the young mothers from my building seem very possible and unappealing.

It all happened so quickly, and I didn't think to get his license plate number until after. So, if anyone sees a young male driving around at high speeds during business hours in a Honda that he thinks might be a Ferrari, punch him in the face for me. This whole experience got me to thinking. Do I really want to be totally shredded? This guy was jacked, and that caused him to be both stupid and feloniously inconsiderate. Being in too good of shape usually just exposes you as someone with horribly misguided priorities and way too much free time. I got my gatorade, continued to walk around the park, and decided that I was going to skip the gym tomorrow. Putting stickers on a Honda is like putting huge muscles on that guy's personality. Under the hood, you're not impressing anyone.

The End of the Beginning

It's Wednesday of the second week of my unemployment, and I think this is the perfect time to start my blog about the experience of being "in between gigs". Starting this blog in the first week would have been premature as New York State classifies that week as my "Unpaid Waiting Period." I hope this blog becomes a forum where I can share how I fill my days while on the hunt. I promise to keep busy, do weird stuff, and I'm sure there are thousands of people out there who can relate to what I'm going through.

I thought some time off might be nice. I'm finding it's not all that I dreamed it might be. In week one, I: cleaned the apartment several times, hung some new posters, sent out a thousand emails to prospective employers, received back less than 5 emails from prospective employers (none of whom are hiring, why would they be?), went to the grocery store 4 times, ate upwards of 17 bowls of cereal, went to the beach Saturday and Sunday, and had a few cocktails Sunday evening which made me glad to not have to wake up for any reason on Monday.

Week two hasn't been one for the record books either. Monday, I actually went into the city to audition for 'Who Wants to Be a Millionaire'. As if that isn't pathetic enough, I didn't even pass the written test they give you to qualify for the show. I find this truly humiliating especially given all the useless information I walk around with on a daily basis. It's possible that the test is racially biased. Tuesday, I went to my 90 year-old, almost totally blind grandfather's house in NJ to play golf. Alas, he was afraid it might be too hot for him to get around the golf course, so we got lunch and watched 'Inception'.

'Inception' became a significant event in my life. I had to urinate so badly for the last 97 minutes of the movie, so it really felt like it was about a week long. Also, in order to see the screen, my grandfather and I sat in the 3rd row of an enormous, sparsely populated theater. We got there a little early, so we sat there in the quiet for just long enough before the previews started for my grandfather to regale me (and the rest of the whispering theater) with a story of exactly what his close minded friends think of our current President(N-bomb included). To be fair, he was very disapproving of his friend's viewpoints, but I suspect that the rest of the people in the theater might not have gotten the theme of his story. The movie was awesome (certainly not without its flaws), but it was hard to watch with someone who needed me to explain the special effects.

Who knows what tomorrow might bring. I need to come up with a better way to make the days pass enjoyably. I have been making long to-do lists on a daily basis to keep myself on task. But, I feel like it's cheating to include "eat lunch" on a to-do list. I'm quite sure I wouldn't forget if I didn't write it down. Strange things happen when you have some time on your hands. I'll do my best to report on all of them.